Yes, Virginia, there is a way to find yourself in one of my stories. Most of my characters are based on people I know or have met during my life. Some are quite lovable, and others…well…are not. It’s cathartic for me.
Chances are if you have really pissed me off, you will morph into a villain on the pages of my next book. It can be quite cathartic to take someone you despise and turn him into an evil caricature of himself. Remember that awful teacher from high school? Give your antagonist her eyes and build, and emphasize her worst features. Then have her cackle as she turns into the broom-welding witch you always knew she was. Or did some person toss you aside for a younger, prettier model? Get them on the page and allow your protagonist to react the way you wish you would have. Have him be the evil bastard you always knew he was, and let everyone else know it as well.
Your personal history is littered with character inspiration. Do not be afraid to use it. It will make your story more believable and heal your heart at the same time. And it might even make you giggle.
How do you retrieve your power from those who have stolen it? Write about it? Blog about it? Write poetry about it? Journal?